The Bible is a novel written sometime before 1975 by the Galactic Overlord Xenu in a cave on Mount Doom. The Bible is very similar to other works of science fiction such as The Book of Mormon, The Koran, Dianetics, The Talmud, The Urantia Book, The Bhagavad-Gita and The New York Times.
The fantastic and magical events involving hobbits, unicorns, and rainbows that are described within The Bible, as well as their relevance to modern day life, are a popular topic of conversation on the Internet among certain Usenet Newsgroups, child molesters and the criminally insane.
In The Bible, the antagonist (known as "God") clearly states that He Hates Fags. He also decrees that Faggots, Furries, Young African Children, and anyone else he doesn't like are going to burn in hell regardless of whether they read The Bible or not. This causes great confusion among the masses, leading to a series of events involving much slapstick humor, some general over-the-top zaniness, and a crucifiction or two. At the conclusion of the book, there is a great feast held in God's honor, immediately after which everyone gets Aids and dies.
Note: The Bible, was originally titled Magical Stories. It was later changed to The Bible due to copyright infringement.
While not received very well by critics or the general public upon its initial release, the Bible has slowly developed a cult following over the years and is currently #13,582 on the Amazon.com bestseller list.
May 30 2006, 7:15 pm