As a browsed my RSS feeds for my morning news, I ran across this headline from my local paper:

"Oldest lifeguard misses pool"

When I saw this headline, my mind started racing with the thought of a slapstick story where a kid starts flailing about in the water and an old man dives off the lifeguard post in the wrong direction, leading to a falling whistle and a satisfying splat as he hits the pavement. Sure it's sick, but it's also hilarious.

Instead, I was greeted with a rather boring story about the world oldest lifeguard retiring. Total disappointment. If you want to read the original, it can be found here: Oldest lifeguard misses pool, but I don't see why you would, as it involves no whistle or splat sound effects whatsoever.

Do you have a favorite news headline that was way better than the article itself? Post it in the comments. If I get enough interesting ones, I'll make another blog post on them.