Let's hear your best programming jokes in Off Topic

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ID:37566
 
Dec 24 2007, 8:24 pm
I, for one, am guilty of making lots of programming jokes. I did hear, though, that you have a great understanding of programming if you can use it for humor.

So let's hear your best programming jokes!

Note that the best ones are easily understood by many people, so try to stay away from satire, and try to keep it in a relatively popular language that others will understand (i.e. DM, C++, C#, Java, PHP, JS, VB, RegEx, etc.).
#1 Dec 24 2007, 9:01 pm
Well this isnt really a joke but a Futurama reference:

*Gasp* I thought I saw a 2
#2 Dec 24 2007, 9:08 pm
Another one from Futurama:

10 HOME
20 SWEET
30 GOTO 10
#3 Dec 24 2007, 9:22 pm
for(var/obj/TV/WatchesYou in Soviet.Russia)
#4 Dec 24 2007, 10:37 pm
C: A programming language that combines the power and flexibility of assembly with the readability and maintainability of assembly.
#5 Dec 25 2007, 3:34 am
More of a Linux than a programming joke, but here goes:

chmod a+x /bin/laden/

Picked that one up a long time ago. =P
#6 Dec 25 2007, 5:41 am
There are 10 types of people in this world, those who know binary and those who don't.

That one is a little commercial, but still funny.
#7 Dec 25 2007, 6:46 am
Why do programmers always get Christmas and Halloween mixed up?
Because DEC 25 = OCT 31
#8 Dec 25 2007, 8:50 am
I know that Ironman's is something to do with Osama Bin Laden, but what does chmod a+x mean?

I don't get Crashed's either. I feel dumb. :(
#9 Dec 25 2007, 9:01 am
I divided by zero




O SH-
#10 Dec 25 2007, 10:54 am
Kids can be hard to handle, but most will do anything for a cookie.

Hell, I've known servers to do anything for a cookie!

</lame>
#11 Dec 25 2007, 11:18 am
Sarm wrote:
I know that Ironman's is something to do with Osama Bin Laden, but what does chmod a+x mean?

I don't get Crashed's either. I feel dumb. :(

I can't say I remember what the a does, but "chmod x [file]" would change the file to allow it to be executed.

[edit]Ahh, the "a" would give [a]ll permission to execute.[/edit]
#12 Dec 25 2007, 11:22 am (Edited on Dec 25 2007, 11:50 am)
Danial.Beta wrote:
There are 10 types of people in this world, those who know binary and those who don't.

There are 10 types of people in this word: People that understand ternary, people that don't, and people that mistake 10 for 2 in binary.
#13 Dec 25 2007, 11:54 am
OMG some of these jokes are dumb. but (Why do programmers always get Christmas and Halloween mixed up?
Because DEC 25 = OCT 31) is stupid and funny at the same time. I got a joke.
Theres a blonde, bruinett, and a red head. well they go driving along the road, and a cop pulls them over. so all three of them jump into a brown bag. the cop looks in and hits on of the bags and the red head goes "MEOW". then the cop hits the second bag and the bruinett goes "WOOF WOOF" then the cop hits the last bag and the blonde goes "POTATOES".. priceless programming joke. 7 8 9
#14 Dec 25 2007, 11:57 am
What in the fuck are you talking about?
#15 Dec 25 2007, 12:03 pm
Lol, OCT is Octal and DEC is decimal. Definitely interesting about that joke. If ya really think about it, 24 equals 30 in octal and 25 equals 31 in octal.

Good show Crashed. :P

I don't have any joke yet, but I'll make one.
#16 Dec 25 2007, 1:38 pm
XxmotocrossXx wrote:
OMG some of these jokes are dumb. but (Why do programmers always get Christmas and Halloween mixed up?
Because DEC 25 = OCT 31) is stupid and funny at the same time. I got a joke.
Theres a blonde, bruinett, and a red head. well they go driving along the road, and a cop pulls them over. so all three of them jump into a brown bag. the cop looks in and hits on of the bags and the red head goes "MEOW". then the cop hits the second bag and the bruinett goes "WOOF WOOF" then the cop hits the last bag and the blonde goes "POTATOES".. priceless programming joke. 7 8 9


What. The. Fuck.
#17 Dec 25 2007, 5:27 pm
In soviet russia, DM codes you!

Not really a joke more of that whole russian thing, plus I couldn't think of one
#18 Dec 25 2007, 8:45 pm
Here's one:

"Take a byte to make sure you 8 each bit."


Not sure when I'll make another one, but just created the joke above.
#19 Dec 25 2007, 8:50 pm
A programming joke?

C#.


Laughter ensues.
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