In four days from today, my friend LAX (as he wanted me to name him here) is going to leave for Japan. Here is an interview:

Me: Why are you going to Japan?
LAX: What do you mean why am I going to Japan? I'm going because I want to and this school sucks ass.

Me: How long will you be gone?
LAX: A year, I already told you that.
Me: It is for the blog.
LAX: I know that, I'm right here.

Me: What will you be doing in Japan?
LAX: I'm going to be, Uh. I don't know, chasing after some Japanese chicks.
Me: What kind of chicks do you suppose you will find once you arrive in Japan?
LAX: Japanese ones...
Me: I mean... What Kind?
LAX: Well Definitely not fat, no fat chicks.
Me: What else?
LAX: Well... uh. Um... The um... the.. the kind... that...thinks I'm awesome cause I'm.... American.
Me: Ai't

Me: Any thing special, godzilla finding?
LAX: No.
Me: Sure?
LAX: Ya
Me: Is that a bunchy bunch or just a little bit?
LAX: Yea sure...
Me: You have to say Bunchy Bunch.
LAX: I'm not saying that.
Me: Come on, Ill support you.
LAX: *looks at computer screen, then at me, then back at computer screen, then back at me, then back at computer screen while I'm typing this*
Me: *motioning for him to talk*
LAX: Seriously, this is stupid.
Me: Its for a rightous cause LAX.
LAX: Rightious cause my ass.

Me: What part of Japan are you going to?
LAX: Handa-Shi
Me: Where the hell is that?
LAX: By the ocean.
Me: What part of Japan? East? West? North? South?
LAX: South
Me: By Tokyo?
LAX: No, not even near Tokyo.
Me: By where we kicked some Japanese ass with our bombs?
LAX: No.
Me: Is it on another Island?
LAX: No, It's on the main Island.
Me: By Honshu?
LAX: I don't know where that is.
Me: Ok...
Lax:...

Me: Anything you want to say to the people of Japan?
LAX: Um.. Me Big Strong.. American Man... You Love Me... Long Time.
Me: Is that it?
LAX: Yeah

Me: What do you wish to learn by next year?
LAX: Secrets of the Universe and.... Why Mickey Mouse wears red shorts.

Me: You know how speak Japan?
LAX: Hia, watashi wa eitokano, screw it, yes I speak it.
Me: What?
LAX: TM, Do you like Pie?
Me: Why yes LAX.
LAX: And do you like strudel?
Me: No.
LAX: How about poontang pie?
Me: Uh..
LAX: What do you think of me going to Japan?
Me: Well LAX, I think of--
LAX: It doesn't matter what you think!!!!!!!!!!!!
Me:...Psh

Me: Do you have anybody in Japan that you know?
LAX: No.
Me: How do you plan to live in Japan for a year?
LAX: With ah, Japanese Family.
Me: And you don't know them?
LAX: Nope.
Me: Could it be that these Japanese people are actually spies?
LAX: Nope.
Me: How do you know if you do not-
LAX: Cause I'm a genius.

Me: What kind of food are you going to be eating?
LAX: Japanese Food.
Me: Rice?
LAX: Sure
Me: Hot or Cold?
LAX: Hot
Me: Soup?
LAX: Yea
Me: Hot or Cold?
LAX: I dont know, Whatever.
Me: So Im asking you whether you like hot or cold soup and you answer with, 'I dont know, whatever'
LAX: *chuckle*

Me: Are you going to get a sword?
LAX: No.
Me: Why?
LAX: Exactly, Why?
Me: Cause all Japanese people have swords.
LAX: Bullsh**
Me: Prove it!
LAX: Mmmmmmm ...... Swords are illegal in Japan.
Me: Mmmm! Breaking their own rules aren't they?
LAX: Nope.

Me: What kind of toilet do you expect to use?
LAX: A regular toilet?
Me: What kind of toilet Paper?
LAX: Ok this is over.

Me:What do you think you will find unusual about Japan?
LAX: The lack of stupid people like you.
Me: What?
LAX: Ok now, Ok seriously can we stop this now, Im not answering any more of your stupid questions.
Me: Why?
LAX: (No Response)

Me: Alright, can you atleast ask a question for these here people of BYOND? *hands keyboard over*

LAX: Roses are Red, Violets are blue, TM needs to stop breaking my balls. And rhyming is for queers soooooooooo. The end. Leave a comment or something on what you thought of this interview.
*hands keyboard back to me*

Me: Thank you LAX, alright let's post.... right after I leave a end comment thing like they do on those Magazines.

LAX is a student in the United States of America, he has helped TM on some occasions including with the post, 'This Game Failed.' LAX will be traveling to Japan for a year, and will be missed, but hopefully TM can convince him to blog about it on a membership so BYOND can know and love him.

-TM