It has come to my attention that BYOND could and most likely is conspiring against me. You think I'm nuts, but I'm as serious as Santa Claus getting stuck in a chimney and suffocating. Right, well, I might as well begin to explain why from my perspective BYOND is full of Teka Co. Mafia members out to get LA MIGRA on me. You can hunt me down with your Teka Co. Tommy Guns, but me aaaannd my imagination shall come forth and destroy the forces that be evil. Arrg.

I've done some observations and tests, and concluded that the conspiracy shall go on as something like this;


It is the 4th of July, 2012. I'm eating nachos and watching Friday night Stargate Atlantis Re-runs. There's a knock on my door, and as I open it the guy pushes the door and when I catch him with my eyes I see that he is wearing the BYOND Logo foo as a mask. Not to mention the bruise my eyesockets got for catching him. Anyways.. Oh, hang on. I needs more Cocoa....

Alright.. Where was I? Ah, yeah. So the guy just barges in with a knife and goes, "U GEEB SOURCE COED 4 UR GAEM SO IEZ KIN MAEK NARUTO GOA II TEH ORIGINAL GAEM 4 LIEEEEF" And I'll just go, "Screw you, man!" Me, typically storing a P90-FM under my sofa, I do a barrel roll and bump my head on the sofa. Then I glide my hand easily under the sofa and pull out my weapon.. A rubber Ducky. Thought I was going to use my P90? Naw, someone could get hurt. So, I grab the Rubber Ducky and I'll probably accidentally heave it inside his mouth and he'll suffocate saying, "MASTERDAN FOREEEEVVVRRRRR!!! -urk, cough, choke, dying, still dying, dead, I'm dead, IVE BEEN FRAGGED MAN, kin i haf xtra lief pl0x?-?"

I'll apoligise and go outside, only to be surrounded by Teka Co. Mafia members that instantly start shooting at my pubes. They're shooting rubber pellets, which hurt, mind you. Anyway, once I'm down violently twitching while clutching my balls intensely the leader known as Teka123 will grab me, punch me in the intestines, and kidnap me. Then, He'll lock me up in a room along with a Pedophile. "Cmere, sunny. I gots canday!" He approaches while stripping and lubricating, and I kick his nuts. Then I grab the bottle of lubricant and smash it on his head, sending a shard into his skull and killing him.

"You haf dun whell, shun." One of the Mafia Members will say after he comes into the room with a Tommy Gun. Then he'll shoot me in the face and start kicking me. Then We'll rumble and conclude with his nuts across the room along with him. I'll be bleeding, and by the time the Teka Emergancy Mafia death alarm goes off I'll be long gone, eating nachos back at my place. But the mafia will come back.. and bomb my house with explosive Diarrea.





I was bored. Click Nay, please.